Anonymous asked: which civil war general would you make love to --- if you knew the next day that you would die in battle?

i promised that i would answer this question.

i wanted to give this some thought.  since i’m not gay, i was trying to think by what standard i should base my decision on.  i decided to go with two:

1.  military strategy and courage in battle

2.  beard “epicness”

with these two factors, the decision became a no-brainer.  i would make love to confederate general stonewall jackson.  jackson was one of the war’s most brilliant generals.  lee considered him invaluable and it was a significant blow to the confederacy when he was wounded and later died after the battle of chancellorsville.  interesting jackson fact:  he was a devout christian and also enjoyed sucking on lemons.  interesting phil fact:  i’ve been to the house where he died.

got a question?  ask away.